a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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