I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Randomize
