I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Randomize