I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize