She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
