I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
