Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize
