I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
