Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
