Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Randomize
