I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize
