Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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