But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
