actually, I'm a sock model
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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