i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
