so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
