are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize
