I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
