Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
