i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
