Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm passing your future prison.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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