so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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