Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
