you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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