Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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