I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize