Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
