at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Randomize