Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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