So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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