i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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