You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Randomize
