I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize
