Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
