I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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