This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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