what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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