Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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