After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
It's official drugs can't kill me
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
