Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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