weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize