I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize