I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
My ass is underappreciated
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
