The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
