you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
