capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
