Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
If I die, sorry about rent.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
