first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
