so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
