Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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